What a wild week it's been.
Travis left with Team Petting Zoo on Saturday, on the bus headed to Sioux City. Emily, Audrey, and I left later that afternoon, and went to an evening picnic at a friend's house in Gilbert, then went on to Rockford at bedtime, where we were greeted by my 3 nieces and my mom. The girls were so happy to see each other that it took at least an hour to get them settled down into bed. It probably wasn't the best way to start off a 4-day "vacation" at Grandma's house, being so short on sleep, but it's not like they wouldn't've been exhausted by the end anyway. Every night was late, there were very few naps, and the pace of activity was really, really intense. Those girls are a lot to keep up with! Emily loved it, though, and so did Audrey.
I swear, the girls did EVERYTHING you could think little girls would do at Grandma's house. They biked, swam, painted, colored, played piano, sang, danced, and fed cows. They had tea parties with real food, and with the imaginary food they made in the play kitchen on the porch. They went to the county fair to see all kinds of animals, including an elephant! They played at a park and had a picnic lunch, and they went to the fossil beds to collect fossils. They had frozen treats on the deck every day, and read lots and lots and lots of books with Grandma. They even saw a butterfly come out of its chrysallis and then released it into the flower garden. Then, of course, RAGBRAI came by the house, and there were thousands of bikers riding by, with people stopping into the yard to have free water and bananas provided by the Soil Conservation Service. They played with every kind of building set imaginable: lincoln logs, tinker toys, Zome (i hadn't seen before but is very, very cool!), legos big and small. These combined with the dolls, stuffed animals, and baby toys to form a thin, even layer all over the living room. It felt like some kind of free energy was willing everything to be equidistant from each other and independent from its container, and that this even dispersement was how things were going to be no matter how many times they were picked up (or asked to be picked up). It was incredible. I am utterly exhausted, because throughout all this, I was preparing meals, cleaning up after meals, picking up toys to keep them away from the baby, nursing the baby, keeping things quiet so a baby can nap, spoonfeeding a baby, looking for things (stuffed animals, specific toys or colors of cups or whatever, things for my mom), hauling the inflatables to the air compressor to get them blown up (daily), getting girls dressed and bathed, wiping bottoms, and resolving conflicts left and right. Don't get me wrong, these are all very polite, well-behaved, and truly caring little girls, but they are all very sensitive, and they were short on sleep and therefore quite grouchy at times, not to mention accident-prone. There was a lot of emotion-management that needed to be done, and it's really very draining to take care of all that. I am wiped out.
The bikers are still out on RAGBRAI, which I will admit is making me feel pretty down tonight. I came home yesterday afternoon, and actually went to work today because I discovered last week that I will need to be saving my vacation for the next few weeks. Today was the 3rd to last day that the girls will go to Ms. Amanda's daycare, because she is closing her business in order to go back to teaching. I am devastated, and I'm sure Emily will be too once she realizes just what this all means. I have a couple of good leads on new daycare, but I doubt I will be as thoroughly content with things as I was. Audrey will be fine, but I'm worried about the transition for Emily. Like I said, she's a sensitive little girl!
So, I picked up the girls after work today, and they both screamed at me for the duration of the evening. Emily pooped her pants, which was totally out of character because she's been absolutely great for the past two months, since the last time she was sick, actually. So I gave her a Tums, in case her tummy was stressed, and put her to bed in a pull-up. They had a bath, and were both asleep by 8:15. I'm still decompressing after venting to Travis on the phone for a good 45 minutes, explaining why I'm not looking forward to another full day tomorrow of taking care of kids. It's not that I mind taking care of kids, because obviously we had a good time (and were not bored!) It's that everybody else is partying still. I worked SO hard in order to be able to bike 44 miles of RAGBRAI on Wednesday, and even though I really did enjoy myself, was it worth it? Was it worth getting up at 5:30 (after cleaning a kitchen until 10:30 the night before), driving to clear lake, waiting around for almost 2 hours while everybody else piddled around getting ready, getting sunburned, and dealing with some serious engorgement because I was away from Audrey for a feeding? I suppose it was, but it seemed like a high price to pay for something others are just whimsically enjoying. I know Jenny was battling similar emotions, too, even though she did get 3 full carefree days away (which makes sense, her kids are old enough to be fine with that). It's nice to have company when feeling this way, but still, it just leaves you feeling... owed.
So, I took a TON of pictures. They are ADORABLE!! We had a great time, and I decided to document the fun times and hopefully get books printed so Grandma, Lennon Girls, and Sullivan Girls can all remember what a great time we had together (and hopefully overshadow any of those negatives I mentioned.) My home in Rockford is absolutely the most wonderful home a girl could ever want. In all my self-analysis of my parenting, I guess I really just hope that I provide a home for my girls that they feel that way about!
Friday, July 30, 2010
Thursday, July 15, 2010
Fun stuff
A few fun things about each of my girls:
Audrey found her "room service" button last night. Her mobile over her crib turns on with the touch of a button, and she managed to hit it with her foot. She's done it before, one time in the middle of the night which was interesting, but this time it was 6:30 AM and she was just waiting for her breakfast to arrive. I guess she figured out how to make it come faster! Her mattress has been lowered now, so she'll have to get creative again.
She also got her fifth tooth today, which was a total surprise since it was a top tooth! I was expecting the next arrival to be on the bottom, and to maybe have more trouble with it, but there's been no fussiness or drooling, and also no counterpart on the other side! Doesn't she know how nuts her mother is when it comes to symmetry??
Audrey has also exhitibed quite a bit of stranger anxiety lately, and it's actually worse when I'm around but inaccessable. Dan and Kerri were here the other night, and she was really upset when she was close by but not in my arms, and when they took her and Emily downstairs to play, she was happy as a clam. Weirdo. She gets SO excited when she sees me, or Travis, which feels great! :) She'll squeal and bury her head in my shoulder, then scrinch up her legs and flap her arms so much that it's hard to hold onto her sometimes! And, she babbles "MomMomMomMom..." Love it!
Emily is alternately hilarious and exasperating. Audrey still does her high-pitched squeals from time to time, mostly at dinner, and they are SO painful on ones ears, but Emily thinks it's funny and repeats it. It's really hard to come down hard on her because she knows better but have nothing to say to Audrey cuz she's just a baby and can't know better. So, the other night, I told her if she needed to make that awful noise she should go outside, and I put her on the porch and shut the door behind her. I went back to (finally) finish my dinner, and saw her standing on the deck, screeching as loudly as she could for the neighborhood to enjoy, and after about 5 minutes she came back in, happy as a clam. "I all done making that noise, Mom." Can't argue with those results!
She can draw letters now! It's amazing! At Amanda's, they've been studying one letter each day this summer, and the other day she came home with "P"s that she had drawn!! Tonight at the park we were drawing with sidewalk chalk, and she copied the E that I drew for her on the ground. It had a few more than 3 horizontal lines, but it was pretty awesome nonetheless. I am so impressed!!
She talks ALL the time, and her speech has so few imperfections that they really stand out as adorable. When asked if she was being a butterfly, because she was wearing her antennae headband, she said, "No, I just bein' booiful." It's the lack of verb helpers and continual preference for the preposition "to" that crack me up the most, I think. They would be easy enough things for me to correct in her language if I took the time to point them out to her, but she's growing up way too fast as it is! So I just keep yammering, and so does she.
And, such a helper she is! Amanda comments on it often, although there are still plenty of days where she doesn't care to help clean up with everyone (she's two! i'm not worried!). When we were in Rockford, she went downstairs and brought up a package of meat from the freezer for dinner. Nevermind that dinner was already in the oven, and we didn't need the bratwurst that she'd brought up, but it was good to know where that package had come from! We couldn't figure it out until she decided to go again and took Travis with her that time. She was able to lift the lid of the deep freeze, reach in with those long arms of hers, and find a package to bring up. I don't know how or why she thought to do that, but she was determined to bring up hambugger for supper -- twice. What a sweetie! She'll often run to the freezer in our kitchen at home to get a teething toy for Audrey if she hears her fussing, but most of the time the reason Audrey is upset in the first place is because either Emily knocked her over or was hugging her too aggressively or had just ripped a toy out of her hands. "Stop that! oh wait, how sweet..." What on earth am I supposed to teach at that moment?
Travis has been finishing up the last few things that we need to get to round out the insurance claim from when our house was burgled in July '08. There's a two-year window to remember everything and get it replaced, so he's figuring the last few things out. It's weird to think that it's been that long, and I'm still paranoid of being here when someone broke in. I guess there are scary things in life, like jars of violently reacting acid, that you just assume you're done with once it's over. How's that for a philosophical point to end on?
Audrey found her "room service" button last night. Her mobile over her crib turns on with the touch of a button, and she managed to hit it with her foot. She's done it before, one time in the middle of the night which was interesting, but this time it was 6:30 AM and she was just waiting for her breakfast to arrive. I guess she figured out how to make it come faster! Her mattress has been lowered now, so she'll have to get creative again.
She also got her fifth tooth today, which was a total surprise since it was a top tooth! I was expecting the next arrival to be on the bottom, and to maybe have more trouble with it, but there's been no fussiness or drooling, and also no counterpart on the other side! Doesn't she know how nuts her mother is when it comes to symmetry??
Audrey has also exhitibed quite a bit of stranger anxiety lately, and it's actually worse when I'm around but inaccessable. Dan and Kerri were here the other night, and she was really upset when she was close by but not in my arms, and when they took her and Emily downstairs to play, she was happy as a clam. Weirdo. She gets SO excited when she sees me, or Travis, which feels great! :) She'll squeal and bury her head in my shoulder, then scrinch up her legs and flap her arms so much that it's hard to hold onto her sometimes! And, she babbles "MomMomMomMom..." Love it!
Emily is alternately hilarious and exasperating. Audrey still does her high-pitched squeals from time to time, mostly at dinner, and they are SO painful on ones ears, but Emily thinks it's funny and repeats it. It's really hard to come down hard on her because she knows better but have nothing to say to Audrey cuz she's just a baby and can't know better. So, the other night, I told her if she needed to make that awful noise she should go outside, and I put her on the porch and shut the door behind her. I went back to (finally) finish my dinner, and saw her standing on the deck, screeching as loudly as she could for the neighborhood to enjoy, and after about 5 minutes she came back in, happy as a clam. "I all done making that noise, Mom." Can't argue with those results!
She can draw letters now! It's amazing! At Amanda's, they've been studying one letter each day this summer, and the other day she came home with "P"s that she had drawn!! Tonight at the park we were drawing with sidewalk chalk, and she copied the E that I drew for her on the ground. It had a few more than 3 horizontal lines, but it was pretty awesome nonetheless. I am so impressed!!
She talks ALL the time, and her speech has so few imperfections that they really stand out as adorable. When asked if she was being a butterfly, because she was wearing her antennae headband, she said, "No, I just bein' booiful." It's the lack of verb helpers and continual preference for the preposition "to" that crack me up the most, I think. They would be easy enough things for me to correct in her language if I took the time to point them out to her, but she's growing up way too fast as it is! So I just keep yammering, and so does she.
And, such a helper she is! Amanda comments on it often, although there are still plenty of days where she doesn't care to help clean up with everyone (she's two! i'm not worried!). When we were in Rockford, she went downstairs and brought up a package of meat from the freezer for dinner. Nevermind that dinner was already in the oven, and we didn't need the bratwurst that she'd brought up, but it was good to know where that package had come from! We couldn't figure it out until she decided to go again and took Travis with her that time. She was able to lift the lid of the deep freeze, reach in with those long arms of hers, and find a package to bring up. I don't know how or why she thought to do that, but she was determined to bring up hambugger for supper -- twice. What a sweetie! She'll often run to the freezer in our kitchen at home to get a teething toy for Audrey if she hears her fussing, but most of the time the reason Audrey is upset in the first place is because either Emily knocked her over or was hugging her too aggressively or had just ripped a toy out of her hands. "Stop that! oh wait, how sweet..." What on earth am I supposed to teach at that moment?
Travis has been finishing up the last few things that we need to get to round out the insurance claim from when our house was burgled in July '08. There's a two-year window to remember everything and get it replaced, so he's figuring the last few things out. It's weird to think that it's been that long, and I'm still paranoid of being here when someone broke in. I guess there are scary things in life, like jars of violently reacting acid, that you just assume you're done with once it's over. How's that for a philosophical point to end on?
Tuesday, July 13, 2010
2015
Travis and I have been talking about where we want to be in 5 years. It started with him realizing that mortgage rates are really low right now, and he's considering refinancing. We'd recoup the costs in 11 months, at which point we'd save money every month for another 4 years until the fixed rate ended, and then... what?
Will we be in this house? Will we have another kid? Will I still be working? Emily will be in first grade by then (*gasp!!*), and Audrey will probably be in preschool, somewhere. What kind of career pace will Travis be on? What kind of market would there be to sell this house? Would we be interested in building? If not, how long will it find the perfect house? (I'm not moving unless it's perfect! what a waste of time that would be!)
So, if anybody knows the answers to those questions, please let me know. It's frustrating that Mr. Prudent doesn't want to move forward until he can predict the future, but I just am not ready to commit to a specific future just because he sees an opportunity to play in our finances. I figure there are a lot of other things we can do every month to save money, if he's really interested.
At the park today, Emily and Audrey and I were sitting in the wading pool (depth = 1' 4"), and I saw two kids kind of wrestling in the water. I didn't think much of it - they were probably both 4 or 5, except the blond kid had the other boy in a headlock, and the expression on his face wasn't right. Then the blond kid grabbed his head and slammed it against the concrete structure in the middle of the pool. By then, I was standing up with Audrey, asking, "whose kids are these??" very loudly, but nobody responded. Then the blond kid was hitting the other boy with his fists on his head, and I grabbed his arms, and said, "STOP! I don't care who you are, you don't do that!" And I held onto him, shouting, "Whose little boy is this???" Someone came running and took him to the side, and someone else took the dark-haired boy. Then, the lady next to me told me that the blond kid's mother had just died, and that he's having a hard time because his dad had been so absent during the mother's illness. I couldn't believe she knew that much about him, but had been oblivious to him assaulting another child 6 feet away. I asked her if it was out of line for me to have stepped in, then, and she said she thought it was fine. I wanted to apologize to whoever was watching him, but as I was leaving I saw that he was sitting quietly, talking with an adult, and I figured he was getting more good out of that than he would from an apology from some stranger.
As I was walking back to the car with my girls, I realized that what I had said, "Whose little boy is this?" really meant more than I thought. I honestly cried most of the way to the car, thinking about it. His mom is gone. He's HER little boy, and he would probably be just fine if she were here. I thought of her watching over him, seeing me stop him, hoping I would understand, maybe? He was obviously angry, not just annoyed with another kid and giving him a shove. He was taking something out on someone... it made me so sad, looking back at it. I guess I'm glad I protected the other kid, and I'm very glad to know a little more about his story so as to curb my judgement. But, man. I know of a few other kids who are growing up without mothers for equally tragic reasons, and I can't even fully feel the enormity of it, or I'd be crushed by it.
So, as long as I'm around in 2015, enjoying my kids and my husband, I'll take that as enough.
Will we be in this house? Will we have another kid? Will I still be working? Emily will be in first grade by then (*gasp!!*), and Audrey will probably be in preschool, somewhere. What kind of career pace will Travis be on? What kind of market would there be to sell this house? Would we be interested in building? If not, how long will it find the perfect house? (I'm not moving unless it's perfect! what a waste of time that would be!)
So, if anybody knows the answers to those questions, please let me know. It's frustrating that Mr. Prudent doesn't want to move forward until he can predict the future, but I just am not ready to commit to a specific future just because he sees an opportunity to play in our finances. I figure there are a lot of other things we can do every month to save money, if he's really interested.
At the park today, Emily and Audrey and I were sitting in the wading pool (depth = 1' 4"), and I saw two kids kind of wrestling in the water. I didn't think much of it - they were probably both 4 or 5, except the blond kid had the other boy in a headlock, and the expression on his face wasn't right. Then the blond kid grabbed his head and slammed it against the concrete structure in the middle of the pool. By then, I was standing up with Audrey, asking, "whose kids are these??" very loudly, but nobody responded. Then the blond kid was hitting the other boy with his fists on his head, and I grabbed his arms, and said, "STOP! I don't care who you are, you don't do that!" And I held onto him, shouting, "Whose little boy is this???" Someone came running and took him to the side, and someone else took the dark-haired boy. Then, the lady next to me told me that the blond kid's mother had just died, and that he's having a hard time because his dad had been so absent during the mother's illness. I couldn't believe she knew that much about him, but had been oblivious to him assaulting another child 6 feet away. I asked her if it was out of line for me to have stepped in, then, and she said she thought it was fine. I wanted to apologize to whoever was watching him, but as I was leaving I saw that he was sitting quietly, talking with an adult, and I figured he was getting more good out of that than he would from an apology from some stranger.
As I was walking back to the car with my girls, I realized that what I had said, "Whose little boy is this?" really meant more than I thought. I honestly cried most of the way to the car, thinking about it. His mom is gone. He's HER little boy, and he would probably be just fine if she were here. I thought of her watching over him, seeing me stop him, hoping I would understand, maybe? He was obviously angry, not just annoyed with another kid and giving him a shove. He was taking something out on someone... it made me so sad, looking back at it. I guess I'm glad I protected the other kid, and I'm very glad to know a little more about his story so as to curb my judgement. But, man. I know of a few other kids who are growing up without mothers for equally tragic reasons, and I can't even fully feel the enormity of it, or I'd be crushed by it.
So, as long as I'm around in 2015, enjoying my kids and my husband, I'll take that as enough.
Thursday, July 8, 2010
A Happy Holiday Weekend
We had an incredible holiday weekend, complete with our own "private" fireworks display. A friend of ours threw a party where there were probably 30 kids running around, with tons for them to do and lots of people for me and Travis to talk to. They even got a permit for real fireworks, which they set off as soon as it got dark. What a fun evening!
Then on Sunday we went up to Rockford, and had a nice visit with my folks. Travis and I even got to go on a bike ride together, although "together" is used loosely since I can't even begin to keep up with him. That was pretty frustrating for me, but we worked through it. We got to see my dad play in the Charles City community band before their fireworks display, which was cancelled because of the rain anyway. Emily danced like crazy when they played Stars and Stripes, jumping and jumping and jumping. Her blond hair just flies when she does that, and although she's definitely her father's daughter, she looks quite a bit like little Kristin at that age.
After all that travel and socializing with others, Travis and I have been impressed with how much effort it takes to connect with each other. They aren't kidding when they say marriage is a lot of work!! Our sixth anniversary is coming up in a few weeks, although it's been 10 years that I've known him. Amazing what has changed in that time. I am so glad to be married to someone who will work with me through my fog of sleepiness and emotional challenges. Emily and Audrey and I had a playdate this morning, and the best part of it is seeing that in talking to other people, I see how happy I am to have MY kids, with their challenges and successes, even if those other kids are perfectly fine.
Audrey's top teeth have broken through, and she seems quite relieved. She's really quite sturdy sitting on her own now, but crawling isn't something she's really working towards. It's funny; she's content on her tummy now, and she likes rolling around, but she generally is happy with her surroundings, much like Baby Emily was! And what a beauty she is, with her hair growing in longer. Just like with the playdate, yeah, my friends' kids are all really fun and nice, but mine are just the most beautiful and amazing!
Then on Sunday we went up to Rockford, and had a nice visit with my folks. Travis and I even got to go on a bike ride together, although "together" is used loosely since I can't even begin to keep up with him. That was pretty frustrating for me, but we worked through it. We got to see my dad play in the Charles City community band before their fireworks display, which was cancelled because of the rain anyway. Emily danced like crazy when they played Stars and Stripes, jumping and jumping and jumping. Her blond hair just flies when she does that, and although she's definitely her father's daughter, she looks quite a bit like little Kristin at that age.
After all that travel and socializing with others, Travis and I have been impressed with how much effort it takes to connect with each other. They aren't kidding when they say marriage is a lot of work!! Our sixth anniversary is coming up in a few weeks, although it's been 10 years that I've known him. Amazing what has changed in that time. I am so glad to be married to someone who will work with me through my fog of sleepiness and emotional challenges. Emily and Audrey and I had a playdate this morning, and the best part of it is seeing that in talking to other people, I see how happy I am to have MY kids, with their challenges and successes, even if those other kids are perfectly fine.
Audrey's top teeth have broken through, and she seems quite relieved. She's really quite sturdy sitting on her own now, but crawling isn't something she's really working towards. It's funny; she's content on her tummy now, and she likes rolling around, but she generally is happy with her surroundings, much like Baby Emily was! And what a beauty she is, with her hair growing in longer. Just like with the playdate, yeah, my friends' kids are all really fun and nice, but mine are just the most beautiful and amazing!
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