I won't post a picture just yet (just not ready), but I am seriously starting to show. Not through my clothes, really, because I seem to have quite the selection of forgiving shirts. But today I wore my gray pants that pre-pregnancy had an extra inch in the waistband, and today I couldn't button them. I fastened the top button with a rubber band all day. I'm sure nobody has noticed, but I'm seeing it, and feeling it. When I lay down on my side at night to sleep, I get the feeling that I've eaten WAY too much for dinner and my gut is hanging out, but it's really just hanging out. And yes, there's probably still some intestinal contributions to that. I get daily emails from whattoexpect.com, and they said in week 11 I can expect to be more gassy than usual. Duh! I'm afraid I'm going to kill an innocent bystander if they come near me at the wrong moment.
So, that's the glory of pregnancy. I'm not as exhausted as I was two weeks ago, although I'm being very careful about that because I'm also quite short-tempered when not well-rested. I need a sign over my head that says "CAUTION: Bitchy when tired." That's probably one that will stick with me into motherhood. *sigh*
And through all of this I'm supposed to be getting excited about meeting this new person that's growing inside me. Instead I am thinking about what pants will fit me tomorrow, what I can eat that won't reek havoc on my insides (and later, the innocent bystander in the stall next to me), getting enough exercise, enough sleep, and all the things I should get done before I'm enormous. I've got a couple trips planned for this summer that I need to prepare for, and once those are over it'll be time to think about things like baby furniture, clothes and toys (hand-me-downs vs. new?), a baby registry, even daycare. At what point do I sit back and marvel at what I'm going through, besides examining each detail in order to minimize it? Because face it, really "feeling" pregnant isn't that great of a feeling so far, and I know it'll get lots worse before it's over - exponentially so at the very end. Even some of the stuff that should be exciting is seeming like a chore that I'm not ready to tackle just yet. Hmm. Maybe once I feel the little guy moving it'll be different.
1 comment:
Why is stuff about life always less than you think and then much more in other ways...that probably doesn't make sense, but I feel ya. I feel that way a little bit about being doing my "dream job." So. I'm excited to see you this weekend, sista! Love you!!
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