Frustrated!!!!!!

If you don't want to bother reading a bunch of whining about potty training, just skip this entry.  If someone had told me that I would be dealing with daily accidents for 6 months, I think I would've stuck with diapers and changing her 4 poopy diapers daily.  This totally, totally sucks.

I am glad I haven't been keeping track exactly, but from the looks of my last load of laundry, it has been many weeks since Emily has gone a whole day in one pair of undergarments.  I cannot tell you how tired of stainsticking and clorox-wiping and carpet-cleaning I am.  Emily goes through more wipes than Audrey does!  It's everything - she still has about one wet accident each week, but the worst is that even on the days where she has 2 poop successes on the potty, she still has at least one accident.  I cannot stand it.  I mostly just get angry at her now and tell her I'm tired of it, that I know she CAN do it and I cannot figure out why she won't.  It's probably the worst possible thing to do but if nothing is going to work and she'll "figure it out when she's ready," then what does it matter what I do?  If I catch her in time, or if I hear some mention of it in her constant chatter, she'll go and be quite pleased with herself.  But then an hour or so later she'll be looking at her fingers, wondering why they're "muddy."  The quantity she can go each day is astonishing to me, which makes me wonder why she (and I) never get a break from this.  If she goes at 10, can't I at least wait until the naptime battle starts to deal with it again??  Nope, "chocolate chips" on the floor at 1:00.  It's disgusting and frustrating, and worst of all, I'm gaining more and more resentment to that delightful little girl. She is so amazing and wonderful and yet there are days I just cannot stand her.  I feel like this is stealing away time with her because I get so very, very mad, and I waste all kinds of time trying to figure out what I can do differently.  I spent half an hour reading message boards on the internet today, hoping for something else to try, and it's so impossibly irritating because people will say the most obvious, stupid things ("well, MY daughter did this...", "try giving her M&M's!"  "after a day and a half he hasn't figured it out - what do i do?", "miraculously, she just figured it out and has been accident-free ever since!").  thanks, that's all very helpful, people, and you are all very stupid.  Has anybody thought about what's going on in their CHILD's head??  No matter what, i can't get past the thought that it seems having that substance in one's undergarments should be enough of a negative consequence that adding more consequences would be a waste of time.  And it doesn't seem to be a power struggle because I can convince her to use the potty whenever I really need her to; besides I don't want to make it into a constant battle.  I stopped rewarding with skittles because it really only seems necessary as a way to learn how it works, and she knows HOW.  She just, WON'T. And I got tired of the whining for candy.  She has stayed dry through the night and naptimes (when she does happen to nap) for almost a week now, so I'm thinking she'll be the only toddler ever to wear big-kid pants at night and pull-ups during the day.

Oh, and Audrey won't nap for me now, either.  I haven't been able to get her to nap since Thursday - thank goodness Travis has been patient enough to get us a few minutes of peace.  Emily just woke up from hers, so it appears I wasted yet another naptime beating my head against a wall.