Jinxed

I packed a bag for the hospital tonight, thereby guaranteeing at least another week of agony for me. I'm so smart.

I've had a rough couple of days, mentally. First, the baby has dropped, which means its head is putting constant pressure on my pelvic bones, creating the sensation that I have been sitting on a bike seat for too long. The pain sometimes radiates down my left leg, about halfway down my thigh, even if I sleep on my right side all night. I don't do well with chronic pain, even though I keep telling myself that at least the ribcage stretching only lasted a couple of weeks this time. Still, this is a literal pain in my ass and it's really getting me down.

I wanted to talk to my doctor about it at my last appointment, in conjunction with the ultrasound results, but I didn't even get to see a doctor. One of the doctors in the group is on her maternity leave now, so they have a nurse practitioner from outside the group filling in. She basically said that she had had a 10 pound baby so suck it up. Okay she said more than that, but it was all unhelpful so that's what stuck with me. My belly isn't measuring too big anymore because the baby is so far down that it's not getting measured, so she wasn't at all concerned. Get this - at 38 1/2 weeks, they didn't even check me for dilation!!!! Couldn't believe it. I really don't think I'm dilated anyway, so it's just as well I didn't experience the letdown from having that confirmed. It was a really rotten appointment, and of course when I mentioned scheduling an induction I was basically laughed at.

So to top it all off, I found out last night as I was going to bed that all hospitals in Iowa are refusing any visitor under the age of 18 due to H1N1 fears, and restricting the number of visitors at a time to two people. I can't think how to adequately describe the stupidity of this policy. First of all, people under 18 are the ones who qualify to get H1N1 shots, and therefore are less likely to be carrying it into the hospital. They also are less likely to try to tough it out or mask symptoms than an adult. And, if I'm only allowed two visitors at a time and Travis is one of them, does that mean that only one other person is allowed in the room at a time? And I really don't get to see Emily for 2 days?? I can't even fathom that!! I've never been away from her that long!! How is she supposed to make any sense at all of me disappearing for two days and coming home with a baby?? After contacting the maternity ward directly, I've decided that Emily's coming to see me and meet her little sibling. If somebody raises a stink, I will raise a bigger one. New moms get what they want!! So there!!!

Emily has decided that she's totally cool with peeing on the potty now. If you ask if she has to go, she'll say no, but if you tell her it's time to go, or command that she "run run run" to the potty, she does! She wore underpants for most of the day, although the first pair of Doras ran into a very messy demise early on in the day. She still has to figure out the whole pooping side of things, but since she goes twice a day (at least) she has plenty of opportunities to learn! Only once today did she suggest going, and she really did have to go, so I'm hoping that the more she gets used to only peeing in the potty the more she'll suggest it instead of me having to watch the clock. And of course I'm fully prepared to go back to diapers full-time once the baby is here, but it sure was nice to have a one-diaper day today!! I have her all day tomorrow, too, so we'll see who wears down first - me or her.

My daycare provider and her daughter have come down with something nasty - possibly H1N1 but it could be anything. Fortunately, even though Emily was there all day Tuesday, she seems to be doing fine. I was able to go to work and get most of the transition work completed so I can feel good about not showing up for work. I was hoping I would be missing work because of going into labor, but instead it's the sick daycare situation. I still have to figure something out for Emily for Friday, but it's not critical because I'm assuming that any time I show up at work now is a bonus. Now, if I can convince a doctor to schedule an induction for Nov 5 or 6, I think I'll be okay. But I can't even get an appointment scheduled at a halfway convenient time, nor meet with the doctors I am paying to see, so who knows.

I thought I had learned enough from my birth experience with Emily to not be in a situation with frustrating and flippant healthcare-givers, but here I am again. What am I doing wrong?!?!